Turns out the daycare drop-off and pickup walk is really a time when I'm showing my kid who I am.
Bare feet in Crocs — I never liked that. Socks with Crocs, also not a fan. And white Crocs gone all grayish because they haven't been cleaned, that bugs me too. Kids notice this stuff too.
Some moms show up dressed nicely, or at least put-together, for drop-off, while my kid's mom shows up in whatever comfortable thing she was wearing at home, bare feet in Crocs. Kids don't take that seriously, of course. But it happens every single day. And then one day, out of nowhere, your kid says something like: "Mom, can you dress like that too? That friend's mom looks really pretty."
It sounds like nothing, but it means kids this age have already started comparing. My friend's mom, my mom. My friend's dad, my dad. That comparison connects, in a kid's mind, to feelings about themselves. "Why doesn't my mom dress like that" can, at some point, turn into "why don't I."
To an adult it's just an outfit. To a kid, it becomes part of their own self-esteem.
Honestly there's no real reason to dress up for the daycare teachers specifically. But looking back on it now, I wonder — even if not fancy or put-together, what if I'd at least worn sneakers and jeans to drop-off and pickup?
Turns out it's not even about time. Just laying out one outfit and one pair of shoes by the front door the night before is enough. No deciding in the morning, no getting up earlier. Just leaving a pair of sneakers permanently by the door cuts way down on the Crocs situation.
Small thing. But that small thing changes every single day.
So here's something worth thinking about: when's the last time I invested that much in myself? I think of the walk to and from daycare as kind of like a kid's commute. If I look good, my kid gets to arrive and leave looking good too.
So at some point I just stopped wearing Crocs on pickup. One pair of sneakers by the door — that was enough.